Hurt

I found myself on a mountain

Feeling lost,sad, and confused…

I stood and looked at the stars

Opening my hand hoping that somehow or another

I would feel the warmth of a hand in mine

I’m not happy..not happy at all and i’m tired of just everything

I’m tired of being sad all the time….and of the nightmare that haunts my dreams

I’m tired of feeling like no one would matter if i was missing..would they??

I need to cleanse myself..to find balance..enlightenment..

But instead i just hold on to life’s little threads that keep me alive

Only there not keeping me alive..infact there killing me..

I want to feel the warmth of the hand on mine

The feeling of happiness..the morphine of life….

The numbness of the pain..as if its no longer there..

I want to smile genuinely..and feel loved….

Instead..I’m sitting here..looking up at the stars..

Crying  on this damn mountain…